Beberapa minggu yang lalu gw main dengan Danz. Makan siang di Kopi Progo (harganya agak mahal sih tapi enak ), dan ngobrol ngalor ngidul, as usual. Ngobrol tentang dunia farmasi, tentang berita teman-teman yang udah melanglang buana entah kemana. Obrolan pun dilanjutkan di area kampus, tentang hal yang udah sering banget dibahas di antara kami *biasanya termasuk Riesa, tapi tadi Riesa sedang sibuk dengan acara lain*, tentang pria, wanita, mengejar, dikejar, jodoh, dan saudara-saudaranya.
It made me think about myself. That I liked to chase man that I really like (but I swear I won’t do it again)and I don’t know how to react when someone’s chasing me. I mean, what should I do? My default reaction would be running away as fast, as far as I can. I am always being afraid when someone’s chasing me. And I always feel comfortable when I chased people, I don’t even care if he would reject me. Well, that’s the risk, isn’t it?
Then I and Danz recalled back about who was giving a hint that he had a crush in me? Apparently, there’s no one on our Rileks’ friends circle that showed the hint. The sad fact is, man stopped chasing me since I was in 2nd year of college. Well, there’s one who showed a possibility that he liked me, but he didn’t chase me, and at that time, I was too busy to chase my 2nd ex. After I graduate, it seemed he tried to chase me back, but I didn’t give respond, and now he’s married and his baby’s just born yesterday.
Well, I just don’t get it. About all relationships things, or at least about how someone must behave to have a relationship. If there’s no one, there’ll be no one then I guess. I will adopt Golden retriever and several infants.
(though it will be nice to have someone very close to me not just as partner in crime to spend the rest of my life with, but also my friend, a person that can make me better and vice versa, and a person who understand my ups and downs *vice versa*)