The Story of My Desire

First time I realize I love photography was when I went for a trip with my classmates at 2004. We went to Pangandaran Beach, and back at that time I only had film camera (which similar to pocket digital camera this day). I remember my interest of photography at that time was landscape photography.

So I took several pictures of sky and sea/beach *just several because I couldn’t afford to buy colour film, and I used that film to document my trip also*. When the film had developed and printed, my parents were angry to me, because they didn’t understand why I took pictures of sky and sea. That was non-sense for them *until now, they’re still thinking the same about those kind of pictures*.

I was broken hearted and didn’t want to touch camera anymore. I tried to forget my desire of photography.

Several years later, my father bought pocket digital camera, yaaay!! I was so happy about that until I borrowed that camera and brought it everyday to campus (and I broke the LCD, and my friend broke the lense..there’s so many stories about this cam). I took a lot of pictures with that camera, I experimented. I continued my desire to take landscape/natural photography and then move on to portrait and other things! I surely took pictures of everything I could. My dream was (and is, until now) I will be able to afford DSLR camera, so I could be professional photographer *well even if I would be only an amateur photographer , I would be the one with very good skill of photography*.

Day by day passes by, I felt unsatisfied with this pocket digicam. I want to upgrade my equipment, but with my unability to save money *my fault, I always spend my money on food or for borrowing books or chocolate :sigh:* I, of course, can’t buy DSLR camera *and my dad won’t buy it either*. Then, I remember one thing.

My dad has a SLR camera!!

Yap, that manual camera where we put film inside it. Hah, he didn’t allow me to use that camera for he was afraid I would break it or used it unproperly. Nevertheless, I didn’t care. I took that camera away, and when I knew that the lense was moldy, I took it to repair store which has specialty in cleaning/repairing SLR/DSLR camera.

From that day, I use this camera (the pocket digicam also). I buy the film by myself *not the expensive one, because I’m still learning*, have it developed and scanned with by my own money, and I feel so happy! I choose black and white film, not just because it’s cheap, but also I like this style.

Since this is SLR camera, I couldn’t know the result before I had it developed and scanned, hence I enjoy the feeling when I got the results. I enjoy the feeling when I saw that some of photos I took were great. I also like the feeling when some of them are not good too, it made me curious for why it could be happened? What was wrong when I took that? Did I set the shutter speed wrong? Or the aperture was it?

I love this feeling. I won’t deny that when I can buy DSLR camera, I will buy it, upgrade my equipment haha. But, I won’t ever forget this SLR camera, this little friend who light up my day (and I will learn how to develop the film by myself someday.. I must!).

To wrap up this story, I want to tell you that I joined deviantART about 2 years ago, an art community web, where a lot of people share their artwork, including photography. I was introduced to this site by my friend. At first I didn’t have the courage to make an account there, I felt ashamed, because I saw many good works but I didn’t have one. In this website, you can find professional photographer and also amateur. Then I thought, “Ah, why not?!” and I make an account, rarely updated my works, but about a year ago I frequently upload my works, and this year I join so many groups to expose my work and to get feedback from others too. By joining this community I get useful information, about camera, about how to take pictures, friends, and other things.

Photography is one thing that I learn seriously by myself.

ps : I’m so sorry for the english.. I hope I don’t burn your brain when you read this *with wrong grammar and others*. I appreciate any advice if you’d like to give one.

*All photos in this post were taken by myself -and I was too lazy to put watermark on most of it o_O*. If you have an ethic/attitude/call it whaetever you want, please do not copy and save these images without asking my permission first. I will give my permission only if you ask the permission.


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